The Daily Hassle

Laughs on the go.

it's complicated

 

Now that I'm in my mid-40s, I think I want to give up dating.

The older I get I think thinking if it just might more sense if I become a monk.

Alas, Friar Jon is too old for night clubs. Anytime I go into one now, I get asked if I’m chaperoning. I mean, I still say yes to try and get sex, but I know in the morning, it’s still sad life I’m living.

 Also when you are this age, you find a lot of women the same age less fascinating, attractive and personable. (especially the latter). Ironically they are the only age bracket that will put up with you.

 As much as I love women. I also have a two grievances with them.

 
Number one on my list are the words "it's complicated".

 
I don’t know if it’s just me, but when I’m on social media and one of my friends, male or female, write “it’s complicated”, I just assume they’re whoring around.

 What the f*ck is that? Two stupid words only used by Facebook and women. I don't think anything is ever really that complicated unless there's more than your feelings at play. Like if your health is bad. You're a single parent with possessed kids. You're a hobo in transition.

Or maybe, just maybe, you're currently being shanked in prison while reading this. See that’s complication. Any one of these examples gives you an excuse to bail on relationships.

 
 

“What the f*ck is that? Two stupid words only used by Facebook and women. I don't think anything is ever really that complicated unless there's more than your feelings at play.Like if your health is bad. You're a single parent with possessed kids. You're a hobo in transition.

Or maybe, just maybe, you're currently being shanked in prison while reading this. See that’s complication. Any one of these examples gives you an excuse to bail on relationships.”

 

In any promising relationship, things should actually be quite simple.

Number two on my list of why I can’t stand women’s antics anymore is that they don't really make an effort to understand you.

 Men are not really that complicated, you just have to dig a little bit to find the truth.

 In Steve Harvey's book "Straight talk, No chaser". This fact is amplified. Steve says, all men have three layers of truth to them. The first time you ask a man a question, he’ll give you an answer which will make him look good.

 
Woman - "How do you feel about marriage?"

Man - "Yeah, I wanna get married one day, have children. I think marriage is a great institution. I think every man would want to have a happy family."

 
Probe further into a man's psyche and he'll give you another answer that he thinks you'd want to hear as a woman.

 
Woman - "Well what about marriage? Tell me more about it."

Man - "I'd love to get married, have a couple of kids. Maybe a house, build a life with someone. Have a dream. Build a future, have someone to really hold at night."

 
Now this is where most women reach their level of satisfaction in trying to understand the object of their affection. Expressing their elation to their mothers and yelling "I've found the one".

 If you want the truth, you should have delved a little further and asked if he wanted to do all those things with YOU.

 

So men are not that complicated. They'll give you a straight answer if you let them or ask the right questions. Women on the other hand base their answers on if they have a headache or they just bought the perfect dress at the lowest price.

 
And their answers will change the next time you ask them the same question.

 

So what I'm trying to say is: Pre-Nupts. Use them.